Diari Tukang Insinyur

It came without warning.

It could be a scent, a topic of conversation, a familiar sight, or even the memory of an old habit long abandoned. All these would brought the past to the present, and along with the past, come the painful stab of regret.

And when it come, I run. Lately, the land of Midkemia often become my refuge of choice. Where noble princes, brave warriors and selfless heroes fight evil valiantly. The epic scenes of battles, grandeur descriptions of places no human would ever see, characters of powerful, beautiful, intriguing and many other natures were like drugs that could distract me from the pain.

Many hours, even days I spent in Midkemia. And things in real world are beginning to unravel. Tasks undoned, chores neglected and God forgotten.

Still, this is not the first time I’m facing this situation. Soon, tale of Midkemia would come to an end, and I would be left with no choice to face the pain and reality again. And when that happens, I know I would survive. I might be hardened, might be wiser, definitely not defeated. For I know I won’t face it alone as the One whom I have forgotten is the One who would never let me down.

Last week I was telling everybody that I felt like a person (who has never swam before) about to be thrown into the sea. For those who’s not up to date with my life, the sea allegory is about my new job as a teacher.

Now, 4 days, 6 PE classes, 240 new faces to memorise, 18 hours of Teacher Training Programme, 34 new teacher friends later, I have miraculously survived =)

Well, not entirely unscathed of course, there were moments where I "swallowed water", commit blunder and mistakenly scolded by a librarian coz she tought I was a student………..

I’m definitely not drowning, but it won’t be an easy journey till I can swim properly…. stay tuned for further update on this adventure… =)

I was having a conversation with some of my Indon friends the other day, and somehow our topic of conversation veered towards propaganda. We talked about how as Indonesians, we were taught in school about history of our country that didn’t actually happen. The funny thing was that we didn’t feel less patriotic because of that. It was almost like a blind love…."Yes, she lied to me, but I still love her" kind of feeling. Not only being lied to, as Indonesians, we are faced with many inconveniences too by being the holder of its passport. Many countries require Visa for Indonesians to visit them. For some countries, Indonesia is in their "danger list" hence getting their visa is very difficult. And the "best" of all, Indonesians have to pay to get out of the country…….. $200 each time we fly…

As if lies and travel dificulties are not enough, it is also difficult to be proud of Indonesia because of something the country is well known of…. corruption. A country filled with natural resources ranging from, oil, gold, diamond, timber, natural gas, and even spices galore shouldn’t remain as a developing country for long. But yet many of our people are living below the poverty line because of the mis-management of the government.

I could go on and on about the shortcomings of Indonesia, but the point of this entry is not that. At the end of my conversation with my friend, we realised something that although is hard to explain, we accept it gladly and even feel a tinge of pride because of it….. We all agreed that we love our country. Despite propaganda, silly policies, corrupt practices and a ton of other nonsense, anyone of us would never think of giving our nationality away for another country’s, no matter how many times better that other country is.

At the end of the day, although Indonesia had done many things wrong, it has done at least one thing right….. She managed to instill a sense of patriotism in all of us Indonesian. I still remember the first time I was asked to write a poem in my English class in Singapore. Being the first time ever away from home in my life, the topic of the poem was expectedly about Indonesia. I can’t remember them exactly anymore, but roughly it went something like this:

Green covers the land, Blue covers the sea

Between two continents and two oceans

Lies my beloved country

Many are her islands

Many are her people

Though many are their diferences

All are called Indonesians

My nephew just had his wedding today at the Masonic Club. I might have read too many conspiracy book, but isn’t the Mason a secret society that is just as mysterious as the Priori of Sion or Knight Templar? If you’ve watched the movie National Treasure (Nicholas Cage) you would know what I’m talking about.

Anyway, as for the wedding it self, it was a truly a lovely affair. There were the usual tears during the exchanging of vows, best friend who tries to be funny as an emcee, and of course, photo taking galore. After the formalities (signing of some papers), there was a high tea at the adjoining restaurant.

One thing that is different from other wedding is that in this one, after the event, the bride, the groom and the family of both walked back from the restaurant. Yep, literally walking away (I have a photo of this to prove it =P) in full wedding attire because the family stayed in a hotel right opposite the restaurant.

With that, a total of 7 member from my batch of Indon Scholar has gotten themselves married. Well done guys…. 29 more to go…..

It has been too long since my last post, but still I have no idea of what to write. Hence, you just have to be contented with short update of my life…… Here goes…

Working  life… quiting NEA soon… 28 August is the official last day, with 8 days of leave still not taken, it would definitely be earlier…..

Next stop: MOE. Starting on the 11th of September… what a day to remember…. hopefully it is not a bad omen for my new career

Friends….. My batch mate is getting married this saturday to another batch mate….. Will definitely attend…

Family…. That same batch mate happen to be my nephew as well, so…. same update as above =P

Projects….. Currently outsourcing the making of my portfolio to a friend… Can’t wait for the result

Starting 2 courses in the next couple of weeks, basic japanese and actual day wedding photography. The first one is to prepare for my trip next year, the second one is for personal interest.

That’s all the updates I have for now…

Many have found that the awesome sight of the star studded heavens evoke a sense of wonder, an awareness of transcedence, that is charged with spiritual significance. Yet the distant shimmering of stars does not itself create this sense of longing; it merely exposes what is already there.They are catalyst for our spiritual insights, revealing our emptiness and compelling us to ask whether and how this void might be filled.

Might our true origins and destiny somehow lie beyond those stars? Might there not be a homeland, from which we are presently exiled and to which we secretly long to return? Might not our accumulation of discontenment and disillusionment with our present existence be a pointer to another land where our true destiny lies and which is able to make its presence felt now in this haunting way?

Suppose that this is not where we are meant to be but that a better land is at hand? We don’t belong here. We have somehow lost our way. Would not this make our present existence both strange and splendid? Strange, because it is not where our true destiny lies; splendid, because it points ahead to where that real hope might be found. The beauty of the night skies or a glorious sunset are important pointers to the origins and the ultimate fulfillment of our heart’s deepest desire. But if we mistake the signpost for what is signposted, we will attach our hopes and longings to lesser goals, which cannot finally quench our thirst for meaning.

(quoted from Alister McGrath)

Today was a good day. I had a half day at work, got off early to hike at McRitchie Reservoir, went home to prepare dinner (more helping than preparing), had an awesomely good meal, and finally capped it off with great performances from the Amidol (American Idol in short form). Should have worn my "funday" brief** If I had known today would be this way =P

One strange thing I notice this morning is that I met a lot of pregnant women on my way to work. At least 4 of them. On normal days, seeing one pregnant lady is already a rare occassion, so today must be special somehow….. maybe Arsenal would win?

Speaking of rare occassion, as mentioned earlier, I went hiking at McRitchie Reservoir. No, I haven’t gone crazy and quit my job to be a tree hugger yet. It was a reccee*** trip for my company Healthy Lifestyle Day. Yep, I’m in the welfare committee organising the event for that day. Our destination was the Tree Top Walk in the middle of reservoir wooded area. It was quite a challenge. Almost an hour to get in, and another hour to get out. But I think the effort was worth the reward waiting for us at the more than 30metre high hanging bridge which is what the Tree Top Walk all about. The view was great, you could see beautiful greeneries for miles away and the breeze was refreshing too. Not many places in Singapore where you could totally be free from man made sounds such as cars or other machineries, and that bridge is one of them. A little caution for those with height phobia, it was very high and you could see straight down to the ground because the walkway have spaces between them for you to look through.

Before I end, let me quote a song lyric from the land of Shire. A song of hope in time of despair.

Home is behind

The world ahead

And there are many paths to thread

Through shadow

To the edge of night

Until the stars are all alight

Mist and shadow

Cloud and shade

All shall fade

All shall fade

*   = Listen to Michael Buble’s "That’s All"

**  = A birthday present

*** = another term used for "scouting"

Yep, today is my birthday (29 April). So if you want to make my day, please leave a comment below, sms me, call me, visit me, email me, anything. I really would love to hear from you =)

I can’t say it better than what my favourite author has written:"When I became a man, I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up."*

Also, an ex tax collector, a physician and a cousin of Barnabas (Paul’s travelling friends) all wrote about "becoming little children" as a prerequisite of entering heaven.^

Besides, is there any good reason to be adult-ish (as opposed to childish) when you don’t necessarily have to?

*CS Lewis in "Letters to Children"

^Matthew 18, Luke 18, Mark 10

Yoyo Man happy

Yoyo Man went to party and get presents many many

Yoyo Man also show "holy" socks and more presents come to Yoyo Man

Yoyo Man went with friends, the shiny one, the princess one and the pretty one

People like Yoyo Man, people cheer and clap for Yoyo Man, Yoyo Man more happy

Yoyo Man only a little bit sad… Yoyo Man’s yoyo is missing…….

Yoyo Man very grateful to MTV woman. MTV woman gave Yoyo Man tickets. Yoyo Man happy.

Now Yoyo Man sleepy, Yoyo Man say bye bye……..